Longboard.net Forum - Since 1997


No bullsh*t.

Now that you guys (and gals) know how it works....my contests...

Givin ya til (and thru) the weekend...to think about it.

If yer a westy..pay the ship...

...if yer east coast...I'll drive to cocoa...no further....meet ya--best buy me a beer or rum...

Either way...my quiver rocks 3 times over...you f*ckers know this...

...winner procures ONE of my boards (my choosing)...if yer game--post...comment..lament...either way...contest Monday (start time to follow)...winner announced Tuesday....said victor basks in untold 9'+ glory come Wednesday....(bragging rights go without question--transport, another matter entirely)...

Previous winners are eligible. Obviously.

May the craftiest sonofabitch win....

Understand--I need the space--and a "for sale" post is heartless & unbecoming....

So why not pay it forward to a jammer...

So here we go....

(For the effin record...the possibilities are as follows):

9'2 Walden Traditional (shaped by Steve...master blank)
9'3 Mayo Soffttail
9'2 Lovebird (bing signed)
9'4 Zeph YYZ (abstract & awesome)
9'5 Gato/Creme Stiletto (Tokyo goes nuts!)
9'8 Kookbox Floating Sidewalk
9'2 Zeph tri-stringer Pintail

(James--so you know...o'hare is NOT available)

Again...MY choosing...but an LB's an LB!

All sticks 9.9/10...cuz it's the f*cking Gulf of Mexico....but....

A board....is a board....

..for a lucky jammer....



....YOURS if yer razory & fast.

Let the games commence..............and please understand--I have no qualms parting with said craft given the people here.....

Everyone here is absolutely fantastic...


Having said this...


Contest MONDAY.
Name the 20 Members (plus 1) Challenge Part II!

"Now more dastardly & clever than ever -- NOW with 50% less cats"

You all know how it works...and for you chuckleheads who don't...it's simple...an image will be posted...

Like this Easy Peasy Japanesey Example:


You name the member.

(Hint: it ISN'T FirstPointPonch)

Be the first to list all 21 correctly...and the Applekat's gonna mail you otherworldly prizes & swag for yer clever efforts (just PM me an address)

Last years winners...ChillyWilly & LongHairHippie are STILL basking in the untold riches (well..by Friday anyway)...

Who knows what YOU could win?!

Rest assured, per Latte & EC's request...there will be tasteful tail shots.

PG13 all the way. ;)



(Gnar--your effin welcome that I threw mathematics a literary bone just now)

Good luck fellas...

Oh...and LHH & CW? No two-sies....fairs fair ;)

See ya guys tomorrow.
That's right, kids...figured we could all use a Monday pick-me-up with a topic that's a lil different, mildly inviting & STILL surf-related.

WITH A CHANCE TO WIN POTENTIALLY FABULOUS PRIZES...not to mention endless adoring ACCOLADES from envious friends!

At 2pm FWEST (F*CKIN WAVELESS EASTCOAST STANDARD TIME), I'm going to post (20) TWENTY images representing members here chosen at random. (PLUS ONE (1) devilishly clever BONUS MEMBER)...

The FIRST Jammer to correctly list all 20+1 can PM an address & I'll happily reward him or her via USPS with what could possibly be fantastic swag..

Here is a ridiculously easy 2nd-grade-example:


(Hint: it's NOT FirstPointEric)

As I said...the first member to successfully list em all (STARTING AT 2pm!)...will have fun prize(s) mailed to them for FREE!

Who knows what endless bounty might show up?


Good luck to all participants!!!

-The Applekat
Any of y'all have a Sprinter van or know anyone that does?

I'm suddenly in the market for a new van/truck and have come to the realization that all cars are f'n expensive these days and that in this modern, smog checking world it probably ain't worth the time or money to keep cobbling together old ass vans. So is a Sprinter worth the $ compared to an Econoline (which is $10k cheaper) or an F2/350 (which is $10k more)? Any thoughts on good layouts for 'em? Any and all thoughts would be much appreciated before I throw down some cold hard cash on my first less-than-used rig.

So Saturday morning I'm at the smog place eating a tritip sandwich and wondering who pissed off god so much that his old cracker ass took all our waves away for two months. It's a tiny lil' shit of a smog place right under a giant chicken statue and I'm feeling pretty good about the world 'cuz that sandwich was like double overhead glassy a frames good and it looks like the SoHem is finally getting its circle pit on to send us a run of swell. The old lady up front calls me over, motions that I have spicy BBQ sauce stuck in the corner of my mouth and then has the audacity to ask me if I have a job. Granted, I'm at a smog shop at 10 AM on a saturday with food on my face and wearing the same boardshorts I wear every day and an old Shelter shirt I got at a show 21 years ago that still has some skinhead's blood stain on the shoulder, but I'm like "yeah, I got a job, why?" And she's all "because your 18 year old minivan just failed smog for the second time and here's an application where the state of KKKalifornia will give you $1500 to buy your van off the street."

I ask her delicately if another $20 will help my van pass smog and she shoots me a dirty look and I rebound by saying "the state will really buy my piece of shit van just so it's off the road?" She nods.

"oh" i say, picking a piece of tritip out of my teeth thinking that I bought this van for $1000 three years and 145,000 miles ago...
Well I used to rely on these EPDM bungee/ tie downs to secure my boards....not anymore!
I had my board on the roof while I was loading stuff in. I came out of the house and found these on the ground. Both broke at the same time. I did have the lift gate of the jeep pressing up against the board.

But both breaking at once??
You guys find any super strong bungees?

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So... New job and commuting is going to be part of the deal for this position. So, a new small and fuel efficient car is in the works. I doubt even my 9'2 is going to fit in the car, and after work surfs keep me sane. Any ideas on a good, lets say 8'6 or so, log?
sorry to be a thread slut.... but need to sell to fund a board...

board is in excellent condition


in RI

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Time for one of the bright spots of 2013..."the year to forget" here at the Jersey Shore! Things down here are getting back together, little by little...slowly but surely. Our 12th Annual Fall Old School Boardswap is set for Sunday September 29th...Be there!

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..admittedly I'm a HUGE sucker for aesthetic (I shouldn't say that...rather admirer)...and after consistently clicking & re-clicking on Roach's fin post (awesome by the way)...I felt compelled to start (or see) a sincere "lam" thread...

Inconsequential to performance--I still feel they lend something to a board that few things can.

Honestly...I love em...the looks...placement...design...

Anyway...here are a few of mine & why they make me double take & smirk:

Larry Mayo...easily one of the most uncompromising shapers (aesthetically) I've ever had the pleasure to meet personally...took nearly 2 weeks to convince him to slap 2 on the deck...love it:


Pat Ohare....same game: (2 of 3)


Matt C's....simply asked he matched the "darkest red":


Z's previous (still love the new one).....but the 16th century woodblock DOES kick artistic ass (still want IT on the EQ)



I'm mesmerized by how different each are. Awesome. Post yers at will.

I selfishly encourage it....go.
good one to start... punt!

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