This is about longboards insofar as this is what is possible if you take one of First Point Eric’s logs and divide by two. Which is both longboards and math. Which is double smart. After years and years of trying to alchemize a sub-6’ groveler that will let an ugly 200 pounder with shite balance and zero talent skate knee thigh high and smaller dribblers like a 1990s era H Street video, the dark lords of Fate, Destiny and Math Teachers dropped this in my lap: 5’5” x 21” Gary Hanel Pill. Been out for three sessions in abject dogshit shin to waist surf and fuck me if this thing positively flies. And allows you to do cutties and floaters and beligerent angry white guy snaps on things you wouldn’t even wet your log on. Although I still think the Bonzer MLV 3 is a better ride at waist to head high with some room to run and a proper fish is a joy on a long point or reef (ala that old Surfer article noting that a good fish makes 2’ Cardiff feel like 6’ Kirra), this thing positively squirts joy and Hocus Pocus in subwaist conditions. This revelation comes after riding the Lost... Puddle Jumper, CI Biscuit, Stretch Mr Buzz, Roberts Mush Machine, Noll quad egg, and Super Fling in similar sizes. Big ups to Gary for making this freakishly fun design. Shackle Me Not.