changed a mind...

Discussion in 'Surfing' started by Surfnfish, Nov 7, 2018.

  1. Surfnfish

    Surfnfish Well-Known Member

    Feb 6, 2015
    Devils Lake, Oregon Coast
    Couple yeas ago, had been hearing about some guy who bought a home in town, has a successful biz in Arizona, big dude in his late 40's or so all muscled up and tatted, let everyone know he's a millionaire, martial artist, blah, blah...tried surfing cause he really wants to be one, disaster, got his ass handed to he goes out and buys a $12,000 motorized surfboard from Czechoslovakia and proceeds to start pissing off the locals with his rude manners in the water...

    Last year, still recovering after 14 months out of water from ripped off rotator tendons, was surfing at one of my favorite spots nearby...out by myself, glassy, sunny, some shoulder to heard walls rolling in on sets...really enjoying being by myself, still working on getting my timing I hear something in the background, don't pay attention to it, start paddling for the wave, noise gets louder, and the next thing I know a guy on a motorized surfboard whizzes by me a few yards away, having picked the wave further up outside me, and I'm pulling back having a complete WTF moment...

    So the guy on the motorboard, we'll call him ds for dipshit, finishes the wave and proceeds to zoom off down the beach...all right, ds took a wave from me on his motorized crutch, now he's out of here, let it go, focus on getting my mellow back, get a few more rides...

    few minutes later, here's comes another set, I paddle out to meet fucking way..really?...yep, ds comes zooming over from the north in a stink bug crouch holding onto his nose tether, picks up the wave and zooms by me...

    Now I'm seeing red...ds comes zooming back, I motion him over, he's circling, I tell him to shut the f'n machine down, we're gonna have a conversation about his lack of manners...he keeps circling, tells me he can take any wave he wants, I tell him he's a fucking douchebag, he's pissing the locals off, and we need to go in and have a talk...he just flips me off and zooms off...session ruined, I just catch a wave and go home...

    sooo...couple months ago, really fun waves shoulder to a couple feet overhead, same lineup, having a lotta fun with a few friends, get one last runner and call it....walk up the to the benches overlooking the lineup, a handful of friends either changing in or out of wetsuits...fancy new Sprinter 4x4 van pulls up, and who pops out - the ds!

    He walks up, starts' bro'ing everybody, I peel down my wetsuit and call out to him
    "Remember me, I'm the guy whose session you ruined last year, and then flipped me off and split when I called you on it. Well here we are, and now it's time to have that talk."

    Well ds pulls off his sweatshirt so we can all admire his bulgy muscle and tats in his tank top, steps up, starts to say something, and I just let go, telling him what I thought of his stunt, his motorized surfboard, guys who want to be surfers who aren't willing to pay any dues, jerks who disrespect the locals who try and educate him....and now he's red faced, puffing up...

    So I finish my diatribe, and ask him what he has to say for himself. He looks like he wants to launch on me, instead he offers a curt apology and leaves out of there like he got a call his house was on fire. And then I have to listen to the surfers who stood around while this went down telling me how right on it was to face ds down.. .bit my tongue instead of asking why the old man in the crowd has to be doing the step-up when they've all been complaining about him

    So two weeks ago, same place, hanging, thinking maybe there's a channel I can get out through, here comes the 4x4 Sprinter fan, ds gets out, walking straight for me, no one else around, I'm thinking this could get ugly, so swing around at the ready.

    ds walks up, holds out his hand for a handshake, apologizes again, says he's been seriously thinking about what I told him, realizes he was being a total asshole, disrespecting the local surfers and all their hard work to get where they are in the lineup...says he's not going to ride his motorized board around any surfers anymore, and is going to try and surf on a longboard again...we end up sitting down for a while, talking, turns out he paddles our local lake on his SUP all the time, I tell him why not learn to SUP out in the ocean...very few SUP in this town, and the ones that do are very respectful in the some more, we agree it's all good now between us, we go our own ways...

    just saw him getting his ass kicked on his sup down the beach from the main lineup, getting caught, sucked over..and then he managed to catch one, make a shaky turn and ride it for a ways...when I saw him later in the parking lot, congratulated him on his ride, and told him to keep up the good work...and he was totally stoked at both his ride and the props..
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2018
  2. Macilious

    Macilious Active Member

    Jun 15, 2010
    "and that ladies and gentlemen is how Laird Hamilton starts SUPing!"

    Now buy a motorized board and torment him!

    Seriously - good for you saying something and good for him for changing his perspective. Says a lot about both of you. And hey having a buddy that's a jacked up MMA millionaire with a sweet van and tons of water toys out in the line up ain't the worst thing either.
    ElBrooklyn likes this.
  3. strez

    strez Active Member

    Mar 23, 2012
    Hamilton, Massachusetts
    Nice story! Props for both the beginning and following chapters...
  4. PeakMaster

    PeakMaster Well-Known Member

    Feb 15, 2004
    USA New Jersey CMC
    What's a motorized surfboard? Moreover, why are they made in Czech?
    miscreant likes this.
  5. dingdong

    dingdong Well-Known Member

    Jan 14, 2013
    USA California
    can you swing by and have a talk with all the aggro wanna be pros around here?
    deemce likes this.
  6. Surfnfish

    Surfnfish Well-Known Member

    Feb 6, 2015
    Devils Lake, Oregon Coast
    this is the machine ds was imagine this at your local lineup, ridden by kooks zooming up and down the beach at 25 mph, picking off waves, with near misses of paddlers...sometimes things get batshit crazy enough that you just gotta make a stand, even if no one else will...

  7. PeakMaster

    PeakMaster Well-Known Member

    Feb 15, 2004
    USA New Jersey CMC
    Holy shit...between this thing with it's chainsaw engine turbine and surf parks....the surfing landscape is changing. Last time I was in Czech Republic....they were a landlocked country so I can see how this thing came to be. Been fortunate enough to never see one of these in the lineup.....yet.
  8. pefa

    pefa Well-Known Member

    Mar 14, 2008
    dig that story- just goes to show can't tell the douche by the bag
    we've all been assholes at times (yeah, I know, me prob more than others)- much respect for those who own it and learn to better peeps as a result
  9. Tenfooter

    Tenfooter Active Member

    Nov 12, 2014
    USA Rhode Island
    i disagree.

    teach him a lesson, set his car on fire, and leave a kind note: FUCK OFF

    Now he's gonna bother every surfer in the line up with a stupid SUP

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice